Stop comparing yourself to others and believe in you…
We’ve all watched somebody who seems to ooze self-confidence; interacting smoothly, emanating a sense of knowledge and ease, seemingly unruffled by social expectations or other people’s judgement.
And we’ve all walked into a room and compared ourselves to others – am I as qualified, as interesting, or as smartly dressed as everyone else here?
The reason we do this is down to under-developed self-confidence and self-belief. A fear that we are not as good as other people or that they will be judging us negatively. Most of us do it to a greater or lesser extent – and it’s not helpful!
So, give yourself a January present and teach yourself a few ways to increase your self-confidence. Confident people aren’t born that way; confidence can be learned and practised, by yourself on a daily basis, to great effect. Believing in yourself is an actual physiological process that impacts your brain circuitry, meaning you really can change your outlook going forward.
And once established, your new self-confidence will give you noticeably greater presence, stronger leadership potential, a real ability to influence others and perform to your full potential.
So what’s the secret?
You need to accept yourself as you are and own it. Stop wishing to be someone else or comparing your own attributes to others. Everyone is different and brings their own strengths to the party, so celebrate what you are and believe that you are interesting, valuable and influential.
Sound easier said than done? Here are 5 easy steps to help:
- Come up with three words which best describe you as an individual: ask your friends and family if you’re not sure. Write them on a piece of paper and stick it somewhere you’ll see it every day – your mirror or your laptop. Looking at these words every day reminds you what is special about you and builds your internal belief in yourself.
- Silence your inner critic: we all have one, offering opinions on how we should be or act, and limiting our risk-taking. Our inner critic wants to maintain the status quo and feeds on our fears and insecurities. So don’t listen! Notice when your inner critic is talking, recognise its voice and learn to ignore I as ‘not the real you’.
- Be your own best friend: often we talk to ourselves in a way we wouldn’t dream of talking to a friend. Try being politer and kinder to yourself – you’ll be amazed how much more positive you feel.
- Step outside your comfort zone once in a while: facing your fears or doing something new challenges your perception of yourself and your abilities. If the experience is a success it’s a real boost to your self-belief – and even if you hate it, you’ll win yourself some confidence points just for trying.
- Surround yourself with encouraging positive people: hanging around with ‘can-do’ people who are supportive of your ambitions and make you feel a valued person. This maybe sounds obvious, but we’re all guilty of neglecting it sometimes. And don’t forget to be a supportive person to others in return.
If you’d like to learn more about building your self-confidence join us for this free webinar on January 14th.